I (42F) have been hosting an end-of-summer party with my neighbors for years. It’s always the same setup: adults and kids come, we all celebrate together, and at some point the kids go to sleep while the adults continue the evening. This year’s plan was the same: I was going to bring my kids (6 & 10yo) inside to sleep at our home which is right next to the backyard. From the balcony there is both audio and visual access to the yard, and my kids also have a phone they can use to call me if needed. After putting them to bed I planned to go back to the backyard for a little while longer to enjoy the evening with friends. I invited my boyfriend of 6 months (46M) and his kids (5 & 7yo) to join us. He declined, saying he didn’t feel comfortable leaving his kids to sleep at my place since they hadn’t stayed there before. He also didn’t like the idea of putting them to bed at my place while he stayed outside with me, or going to bed with them while I stayed outside. I told him I understood completely, and I didn’t have a problem with him choosing not to come. But then he got upset and said that he and his kids weren’t actually welcome at the party because of the way the party was set up. I explained that this party has been running for years with the same format, and it’s not really something I can or want to change for one guest. My view is that guests can decide if the event works for them, and if not, they don’t have to come. In his opinion I should have left the party with him and our kids when it was bedtime. On top of that, during the party I didn’t have time to call him because I wanted to focus on my guests and enjoy the evening. He was very hurt by this too, saying I should have made time. This all turned into a big argument. So: AITA for not changing the setup of a tradition (and for not calling during the party) to accommodate my boyfriend and his kids?