An ex high school friend (30 now) who made me feel uncomfortable many times in the last few years has reached to me about the loss of a parent and I can’t decide whether I should ignore it or not. I ghosted the connection 2 years ago… if you can call it that. She really only hit me up on my birthday or when something big happened and I just stopped responding because the convo would always get weird. Like the time I told her we could do something for MY birthday but then I had to cancel but I said let’s postpone and she kept texting me EVERY weekend trying to force me to reschedule and then pressing me about why I couldn’t or didn’t want to do whatever it was she was proposing. It was so weird. Wanting to spend time with someone is one thing but I can’t explain it, it was like she felt entitled to us celebrating my birthday together after I had already told her I spent it solo meditating and writing like I always do. Us doing something together was her invention after I told her that but then a day later I found out I had to work that night and canceled. I said another time and she took that as a reason to force it. And she’s done stuff like that a number of times. She’ll reach out supposedly because she believes I need something - like when I got Covid and she found out via Facebook. And instead of just saying I hope you feel better, she started demanding that I tell her whether I had someone at home with me to help and that if I didn’t SOMEONE needed to come take care of me. It was really weird. Same when my brother got shot. She really milks a birthday or tragedy. Fast forward to this week, she sends me the message about her parent passing. Which I kind of get, we were close in high school and I spent a lot of time at her house but at the same grain when I ask myself would I send her a personal message if I were in that position the answer is no. But I feel like a horrible person for viewing it that way. But I haven’t responded to her messages in two years so I don’t really think I’m the asshole for feeling weird about her reaching out. And I can’t figure out how I should navigate this because I’m human, I know she’s grieving. I just don’t understand why she’s reaching out me specifically about it when she has close friends. I went to her Facebook page to see if she had made a memorial post, to acknowledge it publicly there at least in lieu of one on one texting or a call but she hasn’t. So now it’s like break the no-contact I implemented because she was being weird and aggressive with me every time we spoke or be a horrible person that doesn’t comfort someone grieving and act like I didn’t know that man when I did… I might ask my parents to send flowers to the family from our family, but it feels so clinical to do that without a personal acknowledgment.