My mom has always wanted to have a mother/son dance at my wedding ever since I was a little kid. My fiancé does not have a reliable father figure to dance with and her relationship with her mom has always been rocky and as of a few months ago they’re not in the best place rn. I told my fiancé about this dance years ago and how it meant a lot to my mom (let me just say here that I am not a mama’s boy, and my fiancé will be the first to admit that. I’m just very grateful to her as she’s been a great mom to me). About 2 months ago we had a meeting with the venue rep and my dance was brought up and put on the wedding itinerary. Nothing was said about it until About 2 weeks ago my mom signed us up for a dance lesson. Since then my fiancé said a couple things about how she’s sad I’m having a parent dance and she’s not. Now here’s where I know I’m an asshole and I’m 100% in the wrong but I made a bad joke about her dancing with her step dad (who she doesn’t really like) and that made her really upset. I immediately regretted it and apologized profusely. I think I said it bc I was a bit uncomfortable and just didn’t know what else to say. Fast forward to last night and she sat me down to say that going forward with the dance is the most I’ve ever hurt her in our 8 year relationship. I was really taken back as this was the first time she really said how much this has affected her. I explained that I told her many times that this dance was going to happen, we even told the wedding planner about it together. But she “didn’t think it was real bc I thought you would take my feelings into account and cancel it or just had the dance with other ppl on the floor” Now if I knew it was going to come to this I would have just listened and did the dance more lowkey to try to satisfy both but now my wedding is very soon and my fiancé is saying it’s too late to change it. I should also point out my mom is paying for about 20% of the wedding so I do feel obligated to make this one wish of her’s happen. What it really comes down to is my fiancé feels like I’m not putting her first on her wedding day and i completely get that, but i feel like she had countless opportunities to come to me earlier and we could have hashed this out. She’s using the “my friends are on my side” argument but I think I need a neutral prospective. And just to give her her fair chance, I want to hammer home that my fiancé is self conscious and thinks our guests will wonder why she isn’t having a parent dance and I am.